1) What The Fuck Is Going On?
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Guys, what the fuck is going on? Minute one, second one and Rick is screaming, “I know this sounds insane!” like a drunk friend trying to add wings to a pizza order. Then we’re looking at zombie Bonnaroo (note to self: create an actual zombie Bonnaroo and profit immensely) and everyone is running to their posts for what is evidently one humdinger of a plan. Is this the premiere? Did I miss an episode? I’ve seen Pulp Fiction and I went to college for 4.5 years to lock down a completely useless media studies degree. I get non-linear storytelling and fully appreciate that the pleasure in dramatic narrative often lies in unanswered questions waiting to be resolved! I FUCKING GET IT! Still confusing and annoying. Oh well, at least they won’t do something asinine like deliver an episode that’s 50% in black and white

2) Didn’t Know Motorcycles Could Go That Slow




Daryl’s powers know no bounds. He can drive a motorcycle at one mile per hour without it falling over. Also, did this remind anyone else of Daniel leading a horde of zombies last week on Fear The Walking Dead? Because this same thing happened literally seven days ago on the same channel at the same time, just without a motorcycle. The writers are taking ideas from themselves, you guys! So meta! Also lazy!

3) Too Many Band-Aids




We get it, Rick! You got in a fight! But there’s just no way your face requires that volume of bandages. Honestly, at this point, it would be easier just to place one large bandage over your whole Grimesy face and call it a zombie day. Also, instead of making us suffer through this black-and-white nonsense (that straight up insults the viewer’s intelligence by assuming they have no ability to differentiate between flashbacks) maybe just establish the difference in time passing by the number of band-aids on Rick’s face? Just a thought, you guys! Show, don’t tell! Ah, fuck it. Just go with the black-and-white thing, everybody who watches this show including myself is basically a moron.

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