None of you asked for this existential crisis, but here it is anyway. Remember how long before you assigned yourself an identity by which member of the Power Rangers/babysitter's club squad you were, and you were just defined by a humble Rugrat? Back when all BAMF kindergarten kids aspired to be the Susie Carmichael of their friend group, and shuddered if someone accused them of being an Angelica Pickles? Well, that punk called time kept on moving, apparently, and now we are all decidedly closer to the ages of the Rugrats' parents than we are of the Rugrats themselves ... like, way, way closer. Uncomfortably close.

#1 Didi Pickles was 32.


YEAH, this person is not 63!



#2 Stu Pickles was 33.


But seemed as exhausted as a 69-year-old man.

#3 Betty DeVille was 32.


She's literally only, like...3.5 years older than me!!!



#4 Harold DeVille was 33.


TELL ME HE'S NOT AT LEAST 45.

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